I'm BACK!

That's right folks... after 4 months of no Internet, we once again have home Internet which means my blog can get some much needed TLC. We have been living in our home for a week now. We still have much organizing to do, some painting to do, and of course the cleaning, laundry, and dishes are never ending. Our dishwasher is broken so that makes it even harder to keep up. On top of the craziness that is moving--Macey, Kinnick, Sadie, and Marc all had the flu this past week. I just keep reminding myself... Things will get easier! We've been fortunate enough to have lots of help with our kids and lots of willing people to help us get settled. There will be lots of pictures coming... just not tonight. I also have lots of back-dated posts from December on the way so keep checking back. It's good to have this piece of my life back!

Out of the Mouth of my 4-Year Old

Sadie loves to make up songs. She especially likes to sing songs about Jesus and God. These songs are often a compilation of bible stories, praise songs, and memory verses that she has learned. She loves to sing them to her brother and sister. As we were riding in the car one day she began singing this song to Macey...

"Sweet Macey, you are so special. God made you and He loves you. God will take care of you always. God is our savior-He will save you. There's no need to want, God will take care of you. He's got the whole world in His hands and He will take care of you too. You are His precious little girl and He will take care of you."

"There's no need to want, God will take care of you."

Words that this mommy needed to hear. Words that this mommy needed to believe. It's so easy to be consumed by worry. It's so easy to be overwhelmed by the never ending amount of work it seems I have to do-especially now. But even now during this unbelievably crazy time in our life God will take care of me. He is providing for my family. His timing is perfect, even when it's hard to understand. God will take care of me.

Lest you think my child is an angel... She went straight from the above song into this song: (Sing to the tune of London Bridge) Poop is falling, falling down, falling down, falling down...

Thankful for the Red Stain on my Couch

This week I received a phone call that stopped me in my tracks. A dear friend of our family called to tell me that the 5 month old infant that she cared for died (from SIDS) while in her home. My heart broke for her and was even more broken for a mom that was grieving the loss of her first born son. I immediately began to think of all the moments this mom will never get... first steps, hearing his sweet voice say "Mama", first day of school. I couldn't even begin to comprehend what she was experiencing. The smell of her sweet baby... gone. The giggles and coos that should be filling her home... gone.

A few days ago Sadie and I attended the funeral of this sweet boy. A little boy we had held and played with. Sadie was in love with him the first time she met him. It's so hard to understand God's plan when looking at a casket so small and seeing a mom and dad completely broken. I was once again faced with the fact that my children are not mine-they are His. He made them and He holds them in His hands. He has numbered their days. It is not my job to protect them-it is my job to surrender them completely to His protection.

As I think back on the first few hours after receiving this news I can remember so many questions filling my mind... questions that may never be answered this side of Heaven. We were in our new house getting some work done when I received the call. Our house was chaotic (to put it nicely). The kids were enjoying playing with Macey's new easel. I thought I was watching them but apparently I was more consumed with my painting because Macey made it out of the room with a red marker. She decided to color on our couch. Before we left to go back to our temporary house (where we were still stayingat the time) I thought I should try to clean the couch. As I was scrubbing the red marker from our couch I was so overcome with thankfulness for my three healthy kids who were playing in our new home... thankful that my youngest was able to color on my couch with a red marker... thankful that red marker stain was my biggest worry... thankful that I was reminded people matter more than things.

Is it January?

Yes... we did enjoy the crazy "Spring" weather in January! We loved checking out this little park down the block from our house. Can't wait for Spring to get here so we can spend lots of afternoons here!

Ouch!

Saying Good-Bye to our Best Friend

We lost in our puppy Wrigley the first week of September. He was hit by a car right in front of our rental property. He ran out the door when we were going out to play. I found him minutes later trying to limp back to our house. I scooped him up and could tell right away that his back legs were broken. I frantically called Marc and mentally started trying to figure out how to get him to a vet. He was so peaceful in my arms--he never yelped or whined, just laid with me. After a few minutes had passed I realized that we weren't going to make it to the vet so I just held him. The kids were playing in the sandbox and I didn't want them to be upset so I was trying not to let them see me crying. Sadie eventually came over and sat with me. We held him together while he died.

I wanted to blog about this when it happened but I knew I needed to remember this cute puppy with lots of pictures. I didn't have a way to get any of my older pictures onto my blog without internet so I waited.

To say it was a hard day is an understatement. It hit me much harder than I ever anticipated. Part of having a dog is understanding that at some point you will probably say good-bye to him/her. I didn't think it would be this soon. I was never a dog person but after seeing my parents get a cute little dog I thought maybe I could do it. I'm still not a dog person, but Wrigley stole my heart. I loved that little fur ball so much... and it's a good thing because he made LOTS of messes and provided plenty of mischief.

Wrigley was our first "kid". We got him 2 weeks after finding out I was pregnant with Sadie. He was our introduction to parenthood. We loved going on walks with him, taking him hiking, and snuggling on the couch with him. Each time our family grew, he blended right into the mix. He was the perfect dog for a family with small children. He loved them and they loved him.

Our Wrigley:

Sadie took this last picture the week before we moved... I regret that I didn't take more pictures of him with the kids, but taking a picture of three small children is hard enough without adding a dog to the mix.

We burried Wrigley under a big pine tree at Mr. John's house (with permission of course). We burried him in the evening with Marc. We wrapped him in his favorite towel and included one of his favorite toys. Each of the kids took a turn throwing in a small dog biscuit as they said good-bye. We each told him one of our favorite things about him... Sadie & Kinnick loved giving him treats and running around playing with him. Marc loved how excited he would always get to see us. I loved what a great playmate he was for each of our kids and how I never had to clean the dining room floor after meals because he always took care of it. When we finished burrying him we took the kids to Dairy Queen for icecream. As we were driving home Sadie said "Mom, I prayed that Jesus will take good care of Wrigley until we get to Heaven. Just remember that after awhile you won't feel sad anymore and you'll just remember what a good puppy he was." (...a paraphrase of what I had told her earlier in the day.)

The following weeks were hard. Kinnick asked "When will Wrigely come back to life?" and Macey would occasionaly point to the tree where he was burried and say "ReeRee". Sadie asked me, "Is it okay if sometimes you feel sad inside but you're not crying?" She also told me many times how much she missed him... she stills does occasionally. I didn't blame myself for what happened but my heart was broken because I felt that it was my job to protect him.

I still miss him, but it is easier. Will we get another dog? Probably some day... but not today. We have enough on our plate. I love how much my kids love dogs--especially Macey. I hope that they will always remember Wrigley.

Better to Give then to Recieve

This year for Christmas, Sadie loved helping me wrap gifts. She also loved wrapping gifts by herself for family and friends. It started with choosing gifts for her brother and sister at the dollar tree (which she wrapped and labeled by herself!)

After that, Sadie wanted to wrap gifts for ALL of her friends. She went through her toys, art supplies, and bath toys to select special presents for each person on her list. I saved all of my wrapping scraps for her to use. She enjoyed so much wrapping and delivering each gift.

I loved watching her generous heart (it's not always this evident). I loved watching her sacrifice as she chose things she enjoyed to give away to others. I loved watching her face light up as she would deliver her gifts... It truely is better to give then to recieve. I hope that she never loses light of this!