Why I Teach

I've really struggled lately with working and having my own two sweeties to take care of at home. My heart longs to be with them every day, all day; yet another part of me knows that God has blessed me with the ability to teach. I'm still planning to take some time off and be a "full-time mommy", but until that time gets here, I need to record these thoughts to get me through the hard times:


This is Anthony... You would never guess it by looking, but this sweet little face has caused me much heartache and grief. However, this same face has giving me much cause to rejoice--today was a rejoicing kind of day! Anthony did several things today that AMAZED me:

• Anthony wrote to 13 completely by himself!
• Anthony stoped at the door to the gym (on his way into P.E.) and checked to make sure both his shoes were tied. (Granted he wouldn't have been able to tie them...)
• Anthony brought me a domino from the math center that was broken and said "What's wrong with this?" I told him it was broken and then said "It looks silly." Anthony repeated, "This one is silly Mrs. Gorsch!" (He then brought me a double zero domino and said it too looked silly!)
• When my students were leaving art today, Anthony stopped to pick up a pencil off the floor--he then replaced it to its rightful spot in the pencil cup and smiled at the art teacher.

Now these tasks might not seem like much when you think about a typical K student at this point in the year. This tasks REALLY don't seem like much when you know that this is Anthony's 2nd year in Kindergarten, however, I need to share his story from the beginning...
Anthony walked into my classroom last school year. Along with my other students he entered, somewhat timidly. When I asked Anthony his name, he just looked at me and grunted with a scowl on his face. When I gathered my class on the rug for a story, Anthony didn't think this was a good idea. He refused to come and yelled (very loudly) "I hate you! You can't make me!" In fact these two phrases were the only phrases I heard from Anthony for the first several weeks of school. Not only could Anthony not write a single letter, count, or name shapes and colors; he couldn't name farm animals or simple everyday items--he couldn't even say his name! He was lower intellectually then most 2 year olds and he couldn't perform most simple self-care tasks!
It didn't take a genius to realize that Anthony probably needed some extra help, so I referred him to our RTI team and b/c of the extreme nature of his case, they bumped him to top priority. After months of struggling to meet his needs our psychologist finally came to collect additional information. Anthony mostly communicated in grunts and mean facial gestures, so it was obvious he needed speech therapy. Our psychologist attempted to test him, but his lack of communication proved to make this near impossible--he scores came out in the extreme low range of "mentally impaired."
When we sat down to discuss Anthony's progress we were hesitant to send him to a self-contained MI classroom b/c it seemed that there was more to him. The team decided to try leaving him in my classroom and providing him with additional help in the form of special ed pull-out. (He began receiving speech services in the fall, but his pull-out help did not start until spring.) Typically special ed students are not contained, but my opinion was that there was no way he could go to 1st grade this year (even with his special ed services.) The team agreed and suggested that my classroom would be the best environment for him to repeat Kindergarten. I hesitantly agreed, but in my mind I was thinking "I did my time! It's someone else's turn."
Through all of my struggles to give Anthony as much love as possible I continued to pray for him. I had glimpses into his home life and it wasn't good. The only thing I knew for sure was that God made this little boy and God loves him, so I tried to see him through God's eyes--some days this was easier than others!
It's so rewarding to see that he truly is a different kid this year! He is by no means excelling academically, but everyone who works with Anthony can't believe the difference they see him. What an amazing privledge I have to lift this little child up to God in prayer... (Him along with MANY others!) God has used Anthony to remind me the importance of loving ALL of his children and to remind me what a difference he can make in the lives of children through me... This is why I teach.